Week One Thoughts

Welcome to the Official Blog of the Fuck Yo Couch Fantasy Football League.  This blog is created and written by Michael Votto, owner of Argh! Not The Bees! which is a team in the Fuck Yo Couch League.  I make that known for full disclosure purposes, but I plan on being fair and giving proper in-depth analysis during the Fantasy Football season.  I will be inviting all the other owners to contribute to the blog, and hopefully this will be a great informational treasure trove to make the season more interesting and competitive.

WEEK ONE: RECAP AND THOUGHTS

Week One couldn't come soon enough, and all week the owners were holding their breath in anticipation of a new football season.  After a quick but interesting draft day (biggest surprises coming from early gets on Defenses, which threw many teams' kits and plans out the window), the season opened up on Thursday night with a battle between Pittsburgh and Tennessee.  The most significant surprise of the night had to come from Steelers wide receiver Santonio Holmes, who popped for 29 points for the night - a total that would languish on the Team Votto, owned by my brother Nick, bench as Reggie Bush and Brett Favre tied up two possible slots for receivers (they only contributed 17 points to Team Votto).  Then with the onslaught of games on Sunday afternoon, the season was off to a brisk but predictable start.  The expectations laid forth by ESPN seemed to be coming to fruition, and the potential for particular teams was being realized in the openers.  Three games came down to the Monday night double header, and two were still up in the air well into the second half of the Chargers/Raiders game.  Lets get to the recaps and see how these games played out.

Team Votto @ Donkey Chain 4 Life

FINAL SCORE: 127 - 84

WEEKLY AWARDS: Weekly Biggest Blowout (Team Votto), Most Points Left On The Bench (Team Votto), Weekly Low Score (Donkey Chain 4 Life), Bust of the Week (WR Brandon Marshall, Donkey Chain 4 Life)

BEST PERFORMANCE: QB Drew Brees (Team Votto, 37 Points)

WORST PERFORMANCE: WR Brandon Marshall (Donkey Chain 4 Life, 6 Points)

The season's first blowout could have been a lot worse for Omar Escobedo and his team Donkey Chain 4 Life.  With Team Votto leaving a week's highest 96 points on the bench, we could have seen a blowout closing in on 100 points, but instead Votto ended his Monday night with a positive 43 point margin for his first win of the season.  Team Votto, led by 37-point beast Drew Brees, had the win sewn up by the end of Sunday night, with big contributions by his 4th and 5th round picks, Chad Ochocinco and Tony Gonzalez.  On the other hand, Escobedo had his entire roster of running backs and wide receivers let him down - accounting for only 30 points in the first week of the season, compared to Votto's 40 with two less positions utilized.  Donkey Chain's biggest gamble came on the starting of New Orleans RB Pierre Thomas, who sat out the entire game against the Detroit Lions.  In the end, Team Votto, even when underutilized, proved to be too strong for a underperforming Donkey Chain 4 Life squad.

Team Sparkle @ Team Minch

FINAL SCORE: 135 - 126

WEEKLY AWARDS: None

BEST PERFORMANCE: WR Reggie Wayne (Team Minch, 33 Points)

WORST PERFORMANCE: RB Willie Parker (Team Minch, 2 Points)

A solid match-up on paper proved to be an exciting one to watch through Monday night, as the competently drafted Team Sparkle hit the field against potentially explosive Team Minch.  Steady production, coupled with a couple of under-performers on Team Minch, proved to be the winning factor for the Christina Ruud-owned Team Sparkle.  Even though Ruud didn't have a true standout performance (perhaps the only coming close would be the 19 point WR Larry Fitzgerald), she did have 8/10 slots producing double-digit points, so it seems that she will be trying to ride out that consistency for the season.  Alex Minch, owner of Team Minch, trotted out his big guns in starting QB Aaron Rodgers and RB LaDainian Tomlinson but both underwhelmed, which accounted for the nine point margin of defeat.  Minch's inconsistent roster ranged from the match's best performance, a gifted 33-point display by Indianapolis WR Reggie Wayne (benefiting from an Anthony Gonzalez injury), to the match's worst performance, an abysmal running attack by Steelers RB Willie Parker.  Such inconsistency against a solid Sparkle squad had Minch looking for a Monday night running explosion to salvage his match, but such a miracle did not come, resulting in a narrow defeat.

Argh! Not The Bees! @ Team Faggy Vampire Kids

FINAL SCORE: 146 - 151

WEEKLY AWARDS: Player of the Week (RB Adrian Peterson, Argh! Not The Bees!), Weekly High Score (Team Faggy Vampire Kids)

BEST PERFORMANCE: RB Adrian Peterson (Argh! Not The Bees!, 39 Points)

WORST PERFORMANCE: TE Greg Olsen (Argh! Not The Bees!, 1 Point)

Probably the most exciting game of the week as it was just a high-scoring battle between two teams firing from all cylinders.  Despite having the two highest scores of the week, one team had to fall and that team was Argh! Not The Bees!, by only a 5 point margin.  The difference came in a stifled Tom Brady on the side of Michael Votto's Not The Bees! and four 20-plus point performances on the side of Faggy Vampire Kids.  A solid running and receiving game on the Matt Ruud-owned Faggy Vampire Kids built the foundation that Philip Rivers had to execute on for the close win, and in the last half of the Chargers/Raiders game, it looked like anybody's game.  Rivers and TE Antonio Gates connected several times to put the 5 point padding between Ruud's soldiers and Votto's squad.  Votto left 64 points on the bench, including a 19-point receiving performance by Chicago's Devin Hester, and had two massively disappointing results from RB LenDale White (3 Points) and TE Greg Olsen (1 Point).  Even though Ruud's team outgunned him on Faggy Vampire Kids way to a Week One High Score honor, Not The Bees!'s first-round pick Adrian Peterson lived up to his hype, grabbing the Week One Player of the Week with a dominating 39-point attack in his game against the Cleveland Browns.

Rob's Team @ The Philly Fakeouts

FINAL SCORE: 118 - 122

WEEKLY AWARDS: Match of the Week (The Philly Fakeouts)

BEST PERFORMANCE: QB Tony Romo (The Philly Fakeouts, 27 Points)

WORST PERFORMANCE: RB Matt Forte (Rob's Team, 5 Points)

The Match of the Week!  A true test of strategy and genius, both teams are owned by players who were not present for the Live Draft, so the feat of grabbing Week One's Match of the Week is even more monumental.  On paper, the teams were evenly matched and in reality, it was a near perfect result.  Surprisingly, it all came down to whether Raiders TE Zach Miller would come through in the clutch for Justin Ferrari's Philly Fakeouts, and he did in miraculous fashion - nearly meeting ESPN expectations against a tough Chargers defense.  Despite the close loss, Rob Pakulski's team still looks like a strong contender in a league that, despite one distant loss, seems to be highly competitive.  The down-to-the-wire finish wasn't the only thrilling moment of the match-up, as a great shock happened on Sunday: Tony Romo actually played well!  The top performer, amongst two teams that include the likes of Michael Turner and Matt Ryan, was the Jessica Simpson-dumping, can't-play-in-clutch-games quarterback from Dallas.  Hopefully for Ferrari's Fakeouts, he can continue to perform and maybe his first-round pick Michael Turner will support the team with a solid running game.

That's it for today, tune in tomorrow for Week Two predictions!